This one time, during brain surgery...

Today I had the opportunity to watch a neurosurgeon remove (debulk would be a more appropriate term) a really nasty & invasive brain tumor.  The following conversation occurred during the surgery:

Neurosurgeon (NS): What year are you?
Me: I'm a 4th year, sir.
NS: First, don't call me sir.  Second, what are you going into?
Me: Obstetrics
NS: Really, ob/gyn?  That's too bad.  When I first met you I had thought you very intelligent. 
silence

Then, post surgery:
Me: Thank you for letting me scrub in.
NS: Of course.  It was great having you in the case, and nice meeting you.  I still think you're making a stupid specialty choice though!

And so begins the ob/gyn bashing that I have heard so much about.

On another note - two interesting new stories today about reproductive health.  First a story on the Turn Away Study and the second was ACOG bringing attention to HR 1797, the District of Columbia Pain-Capable Unborn Child Protection Act, which is progressing in the house.  This bill would ban abortions after 20 weeks, leading to more "turn aways" and issues with access.  While it is specific to DC, it could set an ugly precedent. So glad that this is how congress is spending their time, and our tax payer money, instead of doing things like dealing with the ongoing sequestration.  Ugh!

Busy week

-Last weekend I was away at a national conference.  While it was amazing and inspiring, being stuck at the airport for 12 hours on the way back due to weather drained the little energy I had left.
-This Friday I'm presenting some of my past research at another conference (that conveniently happens to be just a short drive away).  I'm a bit terrified about this as I've never done this type of platform presentation before! Hopefully they only ask questions I know the answer to.
- The neuro shelf is a week from Friday.  I'm feeling totally unprepared and overwhelmed with studying.
- It's match week!  While this isn't my year to match, it's so exciting to watch all my 4th year friends.  I can't wait to hear where everyone is going!  It's crazy to imagine that this may be me next year.
- In theory, research fellowship responses are to be released this week.  Crossing my fingers that I'm accepted for the one I want.  Either way, I should hopefully know soon if I'm taking next year off or continuing on to 4th year.
-My mom's birthday.  I can not forget to call her!

Dear Neuro,

In theory you were supposed to be awesome but in reality I find myself feeling differently about you.  I remember thinking that you were mysterious during neuro anatomy first year and fascinating during neuro pathology last year.  My days in the peds neuro clinic even had me considering spending my life with you.  However, like a pseudo-seizure, I now know you deceived me.  Our last week together has shown me that you're just extremely confusing and completely depressing.

Why isn't a simple medical vocabulary enough for you?  No, you have to have your own language that is even more complicated with all this apraxia, aphasia, heminopsia, and the such.  Plus, with stroke signs, visual field defects, and nystagomus, you're bringing out the worse of my dyslexia.  Can you please stop constantly switching left and right on me?! 

Is it all just a game you're playing with us?  Half the time we can't even figure out what is wrong with the patient, and when we can, there is often not much we can do for it.  Sometime the only solution is new pharmacology with side effects worse than the initial disease process.  I think you just have an evil sense of humor and a big know-it-all brain.  We only think we're beginning to understand you and then you throw a wrench in the equation. 

How about we make a deal?  I'll do my best for the next 3 weeks to study hard and learn as much as possible if you'll do your best to not keep hitting me over the head with a spiked mallet.  I'll learn to do a complete clinical neuro exam and do many many many practice questions for the shelf.  I'll attempt to transfer the information I'll need in my future non-neurology clinical practice into my hippocampus for permanent storage.  But you need to supply me with some competency so I can stop embarrassing myself in front of my patients and my attendings.  I'd also really prefer it if I don't have to do another declaration of untimely brain death.

Love,
Me

PS I'd say it isn't you, it's me... but I'm pretty sure that it is in fact you.  Why do you have to be so complicated and deceptive?

Being an example

Today was consumed by neurology orientation.  I don't know how I used to sit through entire days of lectures for two whole years of med school (and all the years before that)!  But the endless day of lectures isn't the point. 

The point: don't volunteer to be an example.  The clerkship director asked for a volunteer to demonstrate a proper cranial nerve exam on.  No one was volunteering and so after what felt like hours, I finally raised my hand and took the seat front and center of all my peers.  In the process of doing a proper neuro exam on me she discovered that I likely have carpal tunnel syndrome to some extent or another.  Lovely.

I'm not surprised at all by her observation.  I've had off and on wrist pain for a long time thought it is usually when I've been over using them: knitting constantly, signing (ASL), and typing at odd angles such as when I worked as medical assistant.  Plus, she only found a defect in my left wrist (my non-dominant hand) and it was a really cursory haphazard exam. 

BUT carpal tunnel syndrome is one of my biggest fears as I prepare for a future in OB.  [Along with my fears of loosing my eye sight or limbs to years of chronic type I diabetes.]  So many older doctors I know have given up delivering babies or preforming intricate surgeries due to wrist problems.  Having a fear pointed out in front of a room full of classmates doesn't do much for one's self esteem.