Sunday, September 22, 2013

6 months

6 months ago I was just starting to accept the newness of a breakup from the woman I hoped to marry
Today I am still struggling to heal, but the edges aren't as ragged as they were

6 months from now (2 days ago to be exact) I will match into a residency program
Today I am patiently anxiously waiting for interview invites, and continuing to grow increasingly anxious every day

An emotional 6 months behind me and an emotional 6 months to come.  Praying that I have the strength to turn the anxiety into productive energy.  That I exercise instead of eat, that I force myself to go out instead of cowering in the corner, that I embrace the blessings to be found in uncertainty.   May the next 6 months be filled with continued healing, travel, and adventure!

Sunday, September 15, 2013

Another 4th year milestone

I certified and submitted my ERAS application today to an obscene number of programs.  Somehow, miraculously, my personal statement was completed and all my letters of recommendation were uploaded in time.  After all the dramatic buildup, it felt hugely anticlimactic.  

Now I get to sit by the [smart] phone and anxiously await [interview] dates. Here is to hoping that the next few months are filled with many plane flights, cross country journeys, meeting many new people, and seeing old friends along the way! 

In the meantime, tomorrow I'm reestablishing care with a therapist.  I know that I'm going to need good support in place to get through the guaranteed uncertainty of the coming months. It was strange to realize in shul yesterday that I have no earthly idea whatsoever where I will be next year for the chagim. I'm trying to embrace all the possibilities and am optimistic that the therapist will bring some useful tools too.  And the adventure continues...